Tuesday, October 2, 2007

More than I Bargained For


I have to admit that this little 10 pound creature consumes a lot of time, energy, and most of my thoughts. I am constantly wondering if she is normal, if what I'm doing is right, and what the next step is. I never thought I would worry about some of the things that are now taking up much of the room in my over crowded brain. The rest of my time is spent feeding, changing, burping (the most time consuming part), teaching her to smile, playing with her in the few moments she is actually awake, getting her to sleep, and thinking about how soon she will be awake. My use of time has changed completely and I am beginning to truly understand the importance of multitasking and planning. Trips to the store are much better orchestrated than BMG (before Mia Grace) and take less time, because there just isn't any.

My newest concern is whether or not to vaccinate her. We have come to the conclusion that we are not ready to come to a conclusion before her 2 month old doctor appointment, so the decision is to wait until we find out more. I really thought I would be the type of parent who picked the binky up off the floor, wiped it on my shirt, and stuck it back in the baby's mouth. Instead, I find myself worrying that a binky is a bad idea in the first place.

Don't get me wrong. I do more than just worry. I look at my little angel's beautiful face while she's sleeping, enjoy rubbing her back while she's eating, and try to make her smile every chance I get. I just think she's amazing and wonderful . . . fearfully and wonderfully made.

1 comment:

Dorina Gilmore said...

Hi Allison,

I remember this season well. And in some ways I'm still in it. I think parenting is that constant negotiation with yourself and others about what's right. It's all about prayer and believing in your instincts.

By the way, I have a few books on vaccinations if you're interested. This was one of my concerns as well...

That MG sure is a cutie - I have and MG too!

Dorina